Depression Pink Glass

Call me stupid for getting so depressed over a ‘best friend’ but seriously my life is hell. I’m treading on glass and I can’t do it anymore.

List of what my best friend does.
-She’d rather talk to a 16 year old boy than me, that she has seen once. She told me to delete him in case I liked him but made up and excuse saying in case he goes mad or something.
-She never starts conversations of.
-She never cares about me, if i’m ill or something bads happening she’ll just put ‘kk’ even my if my familys ill.
-She acts as if she hates m most of the time.
-She don’t like me hanging around with anyone put her.
-She goes in moods if i talk to my ex-bestfriend but she talks to her all the time.
-She’ll only doss out when she wants to.
-If i say ‘what you doing’ shes says ‘nothing!’ and dosen’t ask about me
-she writes status about me
the list goes on and i’m sick of it. Is it depressing me?
-I cry all the time.
-I don’t want to do anything
-I think about killing myself
Do you think she could have mental problems?
-One min shes happy the next shes moody.
-She makes up lies about as something as small as texting to saying shes dying and running away.
-her family suffer this.

I can’t take it no more. Its hard not to be her best friend because she is taking me on holiday next year for a week with her family. My mom has depression and she thinks i’m happy with her and I don’t want to worry my mom about falling out. Me and my ‘best friend’ have talked time and time again about how bad she treats me and it’s ok for a few days then goes back to normal.

How can I get this sorted. Please don’t just say talk to your mom about this. My mom is DEPRESSED and I don’t want to worry her… I know if she knew she was treating me bad then it would worry her more… but she dosen’t she thinks she treats me nicely. How can I start of the conversation to my mom and what can I say? Please please help?! i’m begging you, before I do something stupid. Also is there any websites where you can speak to someone about you problems online. Thanks

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When I was little I heard voices, I saw things that weren’t there, etc. It stopped but came back shortly after my mom passed away about 4 years ago. My door slammed shut twice, something picked my ipod from my bed and when I rolled over it dropped I know because it was on the screen but when I rolled over it was on the back. Recently the shower water went cold so I went hotter and it went cold shortly after, during my shower it felt like no water was hitting me, I felt like someone or something brushed my shoulder, I heard a few whispers, then, I felt something grab my shoulder. Mind you my shower doors are the faded glass sliding doors. I have a hsitory of depression and hallucenations so, could it all be in my head or is it really a ghost spirit?

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I drink three glasses of wine a night, alone, by myself, at home. I do this every night & get buzzed from them. I’m on meds for bipolar, anxiety & depression, also. I get drunk about once every two months. I’ve been in outpatient rehab and clean and sober for 17 days now. I’m DYING for a drink, seeing alcohol in technocolor. Am I an alcoholic if I drink three glasses of wine a night? Thx!

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I have bipolar, depression & anxiety, really bad. I drink three to four glasses of wine a night & have for three years or so. In the past year my work performance has declined horribly and I’m about to be fired for being behind & making lots of mistakes. My alcohol intake hasn’t increased in the past year. I take meds for my psyche conditions & they were increased recently. I’m in alcohol rehab & I’ve been clean & sober now for 20 days. I have seen no improvement in my life so far because of being clean & sober. I miss alcohol TERRIBLY! What do you think is the cause of my poor work performance? Job burnout, my age (I’m 46), my psyche condition or my alcohol use? I’m very depressed & who knows what I’ll do. Thx!

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I recently went to my psychiatrist and he diagnosed me with unipolar depression and adhd (type 5 limbic) and I am currently not taking any medication because my parents do not wish for me to do so, I am 17. But recently I’ve been think a long way back and was wondering if I had any mixed bipolar symptoms.

When I was a child I was constantly forgetful as I am today, but I would have little tantrums where I would cry destroy some stuff, stab people with pencils over little things (but I believe is was the build up of all the little things I just needed one to set me off). Two times in my life it has been bad and I ended up crying in a ball and my throat would close up and I would have to go to the ER. However I think that these things came in cycles because I’ve had really good years and really ad years. During fifth grade my grades plummeted and I couldn’t pay attention to anything first suicidal thoughts. 6-7th grade I was relatively happy yet I always talked about suicide and clinical depression but only jokingly (haha irony). 8th grade I was very depressed wanting to take my bike across blind intersections. Freshman year, I was F!@#ing ecstatic, I would go around and give everyone hugs and I made a lot of friends and stuff, I would always raise my hand in class, I took college level classes and passed them, I used to wear candy canes off my glasses and other weird and what some called "eccentric" things. 10th grade is when my insomnia really kicked in, I just couldn’t sleep for 2-3 days and still can’t sleep up to this day. I remember not being able to go to sleep on time before, but this is really bad. Now in 11th grade the depression is just bad, I had to drop classes and am currently failing a couple of them. I cannot focus on anything, except things that REALLY interest me. Most recently though I have been having hallucinations/vivid dreams? (not sure if I’m asleep or awake) I hear myself just laughing maniacally and my mouth is wide open, I feel like my soul is leaving my body and I get flashes of the devil in my vision. However this has not been repeated since. Even though I can’t go to sleep I can’t wake up/get out of bed. I have an extremely short fuse and get angry at people trying to help me I can’t stand the words "thank you." I’m probably forgetting something but I also ride motorcycles and partake in masturbation, I am kind of a loner but I do have friends.
Oh yeah and I had this kinda weird thing recently where I enrolled in a local community college and was going to drop out of high school, I did it in one day, then the next week I called it off, so i guess you can say I’m impulsive.

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Well, I’m a 12 year old boy and I am massively depressed. And it’s getting worse everyday. So, It’s the summer holidays now and I have just finished Year 7. I came to secondary school all by myself and I have made a couple of close friends that I would hang around with and go the cinemas with and a couple of friends I might just say hi to. Well at least I think their my friends, they always have something negative to say about me wether it’s having spots or pimples or being skin or getting new glasses. You should see the way these people look in my school (i go to an all boys school btw) and according to themselves they’re 100% perfect. I never got bullied in Primary school and I was happy and was never mean to anyone, I am positive to say that I do get bullied or teased in Secondary school and I have developed that if someone is mean to me, I am mean to them (revenge). Deep down I am one of the nicest people in the world and I would do anything for anyone, wether its lending a pencil (which I don’t do any more because they don’t give them back). Watching my old friends make status’ on facebook about being so happy in their new schools and everything its make me think twice about my life. I excerice, I TRY to eat healthy and I look horrible, I understand nobody is perfect. People tease me about my glasses, spots, being underweight, being pale etc.
I have looked up the symptoms of childhood depression and I do have those symptoms:
Simply appearing unhappy much of the time. (definitely)
Headaches, stomach aches, tiredness and other vague physical complaints that appear to have no obvious cause. (tiredness and headaches)
Spending a lot of time in bed but sleeping badly and waking early in the morning. (i’m always tired and always in bed)
Doing badly at school. (not really)
Major changes in weight. (one day I am 6 stone 5 pounds, the next I’m almost 7 stone).
Being unusually irritable, sulky or becoming quiet and introverted. (i’m never happy, sulky and quite are great words)
Losing interest in favourite hobbies. (i’ve never really had any hobbies, but because I’m so tired and fatigue I don’t want to do anything)
Having poor self-esteem or recurrent feelings of worthlessness. (definitely)
Contemplating suicide. (i think about committing suicide every day).

Sometimes, I just think to my self why do I even bother? even writing this now, no one will probably even be bothered reading this. I am nothing to anyone.
even on the Wii Fit I push my self to get top score but nothing. On my assessments in school, I get A*s on all my computer work and in my assessment I got a 4A. Another boy in my class gets B’s and C’s and got a 4B in the assessment and he is moving up from Set 3 to Set 2. It’s not even fair!
I pray to god every night to see if one day when I wake up and go to school, it might be a good day that I could enjoy. I don’t just pray for me but my family and friends. What am I doing wrong in my life?

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I know this is probably going to be long, but can someone please help me?

Okay, my brother is addicted to crack, heroin, cough medicine, EVERYTHING. He’s probably been arrested 20 or more times in the past month for shoplifting, possesion, hitting his girlfriend and stuff like that. He’s extremely violent and cynical, and has been like that for as long as I can remember, and is always starting fights with me. Yeasterday, he started throwing stuff like silverware at me because he thought I was being too loud. I was hyperventilating in the kitchen, and I heard my whole family talking about how much of a burden I am, and how they wish I would leave them alone and shit in the living room. This includes my brother, mom, and dad. Today, I was talking on the phone to my cousin (who is really the only friend I have) and my brother came in my room and told me to give him the phone, so I did. Apparently his girlfriend called from jail a few hours ago, and since I didn’t pick up (I wasn’t even awake then) everything that was happening to him in life was my fault. I went downstairs, to talk to my dad about how I hate that everything is blamed on me, and my brother started screaming more. He started throwing the glass tops of candles at me, and was threatening me with knifes and laughing. I told him I wish he was dead, and my dad started twisting my arm back and stuff because I was walking toward him. I told me dad to "get the f*ck off of me" and he started digging his nails into my arm, and hitting me for talking to him like that. Then my brother started telling me to kill myself (I have had severe depression for years, and have tried to commit suicide many times). So I got away from my dad, and told him I hated him, and he said something like, "I hate you way more." My other brother gave me his cell phone to call my mom to pick me up (she’s at my aunt’s house) and I probably called her 15 or more times, and she didn’t pick up. When I went downstairs to give my brother back his cell phone, the one who was throwing stuff at me, was holdig a champaign glass like he was going to break it and cut me the entire time. Now I’m in my room, and I’m really scared because I have no doubt that my brother will come in and kill me, and know that my dad won’t stop it. I honestly don’t know what to do with my life because, my whole family hates me, I have NO friends, except my cousin who live really far away, and her parents hate me. And no where to go. I’m really considering suicide again, and have already taken about 12 sleeping/ asprin pills (but I know that won’t kill me). I see no point in living if this is going to be a constant thing, because it happens almost everyday. Please give me any advice you can, and please don’t tell me to call the cops, because I know it won’t do anything.

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i have my reasons some i cant explain some i dont rember since i blocked it out

but it hurts i tried to kill my self when i was 7 years old that was the first time ive overdosed on pills but that never worked ive tried to overdose on achoul but i vomit b4 i drink enough im 13 now and i know im a coward for not going through life and just escaping taking the easy way out and i know i wont be missed maybe my parents and a few friends would morn but its better this way for my parents they would be much beter off . and my friends would eventully forget its not like there all that close ive never had a best friend before. my mom told me she wanted to die and it was my fault id get it if i was a kid who always bitched and stuff but i wasnt i use to always be there when my brother and dad looked away they dont really do emotions to well

but i listened when she walked into the highway wanting to get hit by a car i followed her and brought her back i walked in the middle with her but no matter what i did she didnt vare it was my fault for everything so from then on i never stayed in the same room with my parents to long i never cried infront of them i got a job so they wouldnt have to pay for me i did everything opisote from before cuz i thought maybe thats what they wanted but no it was still the same maybe even worst when my mum was mean and made me sad my dad was always there being nice he was prob the only reson i was alive so long but then he stoppped caring being there for me idk why but he did my mum and him both call me fat its not like im morbidlly obease im only 110 and they just say stuff like im ugly but in jokes but theres truth behinde every lie isnt there and my mum sways stuff about depression and how she feels then she goes but you wouldnt get it ur life is great since ur young but she dosent get almost everything she says is what im going through but all i can do is nod along because i promised my self id never show anyone my weakness i wouldnt cry infront of them ever again the only reason her and my dad are still together is because they dont want to split couse of us the kids and when i tell her go if it makes u happy she says you just want to get rid of me nothing NOTHING i do satisfyes either of them but if i was gone they wouldnt have to stay in that relation ship

and my brother i KNOW he wouldnt care hes pushed me down flights of stairs back handed me so hard my glasses flew off and other things but i dont mind its beter to be in physical pain then emotinal ive done my fair share to him so dont think harshly of him i love him hes still my brother and i love my parents even though they dont feel the same they may think they do but its just because they think they have to as my parents

i know im a coward for wanting to kill my self but i want to atleast goto 9th grade i will wait that long
no i cant and wont get help from a thearpist or anything i dont have an adult i can talk to or a friend who would get it there worries are there boy friends and being pretty. dont think bad of my family its all my fault i deserve the pain i know i do but i cant take it anymore i cut to on my stoumach arms wrist but though its wrong it help me cope i would have been dead long before if i hadnt so think about this next time u think badly of cutters or cutting it was problly the only reason there still alive

I HAVE NO IDEA WHY I POSTED THIS BUT I WANTED SOMEONE TO KNOW MY PAIN THOUGH U WONT UNDERSTAND THE WORDS THAT WERE SAID TO ME BY THEM IT HURTS SO MUCH MORE THEN A PUNCH OR PHYSICAL PAIN

no you dont have to read it i honestly dont care i just wanted to write it you owe me nothing DO NOT read this its not worth it i just want to post it so atleast someone knows how much of a coward i am im not inocent at all i hurt my mother and brother and father i deserve this

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When I was little, I would get up really early and watch Sailor Moon. It was on at 6 or 7, so it was still dark out. Idk why, but the darkness kinda scared me. But I loved the show too much to let it bother me. I remember there was a a scary episode about darkness and it kinda freaked me out. It was a weird emotion. I think I felt it in a few dreams. But I was like 4, so whatever. I’ve recently been watching Vampire Knight and I’ve developed an addiction to Pocky, and I’ve been getting that feeling again. It’s like a frightened hopelessness. I’ve had dreams where I’m trapped in another world filled with darkness, depression, blood, stained glass, vampires, roses, apocalypses… I don’t think there’s any link to my childhood, but it’s the same feeling. It’s beautiful… it’s a delicious insanity I’d love to get lost in. Do you have a similar feeling? Or a feeling that doesn’t quite make sense to you? Can you help me understand these dreams? It’s unreal but familiar, difficult to explain.

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ok i’m 15. I have depression. I’m livin in the same house w my uncle Who’s bi polar and something else. But today he made me so upset. I ran upstairs started punching the wallss breaking glass. Throwing stuff. I cut pretty deep. I’m so upset. I been bleeding since 1 and its 2 thirty. Should i go to hospital? Wut do i do about my uncle i cannot be around it anymore. Help me please

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